TEXTS FROM LAST NIGHT

[slushfund]

What the hell happened last night? I don't know and I don't think you do either.
1. Make a thread with your characters name, canon, etc. Leave it blank or comment with a TFLN.
2. Stuff happens. AKA people respond to you.
3. You can make them up or string together some actual TFLNs.
4. Always drink responsibly. In the future, of course.

Comments

hiruma youichi | eyeshield 21

[slushfund]

911 shoild start accepting text msgs.

[thymesia]

COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS

[slushfund]

what's your 20

[thymesia]

uh
she got DDs

im pretty sure sheds legal anyway

[slushfund]

what's your 20 = tell me your location fuckstick.
fireworks are always a plan.

ps you're 40 when are you going t o stop touching teenage girls, srs question.

[guarder]

[WELL OK SURE] This is 911 speaking.
How may I help you?

[slushfund]

the fence got me, i need the jaws of life stat.
or a pair of scissors.

[guarder]

The Fence got you?? [is that the name of a notorious hitman or what]
I suppose I would need your location, first.

[slushfund]

the park where you shit the bed on your football tryout.

[ Hello, Robert. ]

its got my leg i feel like i'm in evil dead.

[ex_relaxfriend684]

911 is slow enough without having to decipher text speak.

[slushfund]

how hard is it to decipher 'i'm bleeding everywhere'?
real talk.

[ex_relaxfriend684]

what if you bleed profusely over your phone and you can't see your keys rendering you unable to type coherently. what do you do then?

wait, are you bleeding everywhere?

[So he knows if he should laugh.]

[slushfund]

if you were going to die i thin kyou could shred a little shame to lick it off.

but lol no that was an example dipshit.
sorry to disappoint.

Re: hiruma youichi | eyeshield 21

[ex_prizeneck379]

go to bed i'm not taking you to mcdonalds

[slushfund]

i didn't even ask yet negative nancy.
don't you want an angus burger with melted cheese and bacon and

[ omg now he wants mcd's so bad. ]

we're going there.

[ex_prizeneck379]

you ain't drivin

[slushfund]

i can't drive i'm shittered.
come pick me up rn.

[trashcompacting]

SMS fuck a duck a lame quarterback trash

[ He feels so clever. Wait until he reads this when sober. ]

[slushfund]

the only one fucking dicks here is you.

[ Ready to correct the typo he sees, he decides that "duck" can safely stay as "dick". ]

[trashcompacting]

[ No, no, he meant "duck". ]

now i know whats on ur mind u queer

what u get me for my bday, Satan

[slushfund]

it was your birthday???
oh nooooo.

[ He knew. ]

[fuckingold]

youre the reason i lose Never Have I Ever

[slushfund]

think of all the experiences you have under your belt now.
and i don't hear a word of thanks.

[fuckingold]

bite me
no i take it back b/c you really will
i know this game

[slushfund]

if youcan't take the heat get out of the garden.